Jewish woman's fight against tradition.

by: ONE FOR ISRAEL Ministry

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everyone is working the way up to God they really don't get into the fact that really God came down to us there was an explanation of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur and Sunday school teacher had an actual scale and she was demonstrating how we had this this this on the good side this this this on the bad side we had to make sure that the good side outweighed the bad side for us to be written into the book of life third grade I'm eight years old I was petrified needed to please this this God okay I have to be holy I have to be holy you can't do it it doesn't make sense I would ask so many questions why are we doing this what is the purpose what's the meaning historical significance if the good outweighs the bad then I'm written in the book of life but holiday comes around the next year so I'm only written in for that one year the response was always the same we're doing this because this is what Jews did I also felt this emptiness inside of me the need to be the best perfectionist living up to expectations a lot of anxiety and I was really good in my roles whether it was a role of a daughter a role of a student wife mom trying to control things my situations people if I can do everything I don't need God I was invited to a women's seminar there was a woman who had a real potter's wheel and she was molding a pot she was focused on the scripture discussing we are the clay you are Potter we are all the work of your hands if I'm the clay and God is molding me he had a reason for it I'm listening to the speaker she's seamlessly weaving the story the scriptures from the Tanakh to the New Testament all throughout everything from childhood are just like flooding into me questions the questions that I would hammer away as that child and God gave me such a supernatural oomph desire hunger ability to all of a sudden research and I'm digging and digging and finding all sorts of fascinating things talking to some rabbis I would ask questions and the answers would drive me to scripture because to me they felt somewhat incomplete many in the Jewish community don't receive the New Testament as something for Jewish people so much has been done in the name of Jesus it's just accepted you know this is what we do this is what we don't do this is who we are this is who or not Jesus Jews it just doesn't connect if you're a culture that has been so persecuted and you're holding on to something so tightly it makes you digging your heels and make sure that you retain that ethnicity even stronger and I don't even know what I was looking for quite honestly but then all my delving I started to see that it's not this separate book it actually is seamlessly connected to the Tanakh everything flows all the blood sacrifices in Leviticus and again coming back to Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur what the holidays signify well that was leading up to Jesus he's the final sacrifice atonement is a covering he removed my body of sin he took that upon himself on the cross and then he gave me his righteousness and at that moment it was crystal clear everything was hitting me and I was crying my sin past present and future is forgiven that's freedom the shackles came flying off I was just given a whole brand new identity I am holy I am forgiven I am righteous I am his beloved to give control that I've never really had a way to a God who not only is he in control sovereign he is in complete control of every molecule on this planet including me it's not this gritting my teeth trying to please this distant holy God it takes the pressure off of me because it's not about me I'm free to live I'm free to walk I'm free to do I feel that other people be who they are it is exciting I have a purpose my purpose in life is to live for God I know who he is now and every day I'm learning more and more and more who he is follow his leading enjoy

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